Reflect

19,000 children die every day from preventable causes.

Nineteen thousand. I would tell you to take a minute to let this number sink in, but I don’t think it really can. This is an incomprehensible number to me. So, lets talk about the light that drives out all darkness. Darkness in the form of 19,000 children dying every day, women being sold into sex slavery, and people living without clean drinking water.

Truthfully, friends, I wrote that last sentence and sat in my room and cried. I am one person. You are one person. How on earth can we help? Thankfully, the Bible tells us how.

These facts need to be brought out of the darkness and into the light and, in my opinion, talked about more often. We, as Christ followers, have been given a mission. My “calling” isn’t to be in TZ. My calling is to be the light of Jesus wherever I am and Jesus has placed me in TZ. All of us are “called” to the same thing – to be the light of Jesus and to care for the poor. We have all been called to the same fight.

In my 20 years of reading the Bible, it is clear to me Jesus made a pretty big deal about loving people.

“I (John) ask that we love one another. And this love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.” 2 John 5-6

I took a trip to Zanzibar, TZ with my mom and friends from Germany this week. It was such a refreshing time away to really relax and not worry about work. I loved every sweaty minute of it. Really – Zanzibar is super hot. I tan easily, but I burnt like none other while in Zanzibar. Stupidly, I forgot that I had started taking malaria meds again which make me sensitive to the sun. Needless to say, my butt cheeks now look like a candy cane – white and red striped. Anyways, as I was pondering why I burnt so badly, I started thinking about all of the different places on this lovely earth where the sun has graced my white skin with its rays and that in every place it’s the same sun. But, the sun goes down and the darkness takes over and it can hide oh so much.

Because of the flight pattern from Arusha to Amsterdam, there is a stop over in Dar es Salaam where those going on to Amsterdam stay on the plane while its being cleaned and restocked. Some people get off the plane if their destination was Dar and others get on the plane who are heading to Amsterdam. So, I’ve had my fair share of time sitting on the tarmac at the Dar es Salaam airport. However, I’ve never sat next to the window to see the city lights. Flying out of Zanzibar, I had a stop over flight in…you guessed it, Dar. This time I got to see the city lights. I knew Dar was a big city, but it was a lot bigger and brighter than I thought it would be.

From the airplane, it looked like any other western city. There are buildings that look like western homes and streets with cars driving on them like anywhere else. Here’s the thing, I’ve lived in TZ for almost a year and I know what these city streets really look like. It reminded me of just how much the darkness can hide.

The darkness hides homes built out of mud. Dirty drinking water. Malnourishment. AIDS. Lost souls.

Jesus drives out all darkness. He is the perfect light. We are made in His image to reflect His light and to fight the dark things of this world. When we focus on the main mission Jesus left for us, the Church, to do (love people), by default alone, we will help expose these dark areas.

My wonderful friend, Ashley, who’s a long term volunteer at Neema rescued two little puppies awhile back. She found a nearby family to keep the dogs and she goes over every day to feed them and hang out with the children who live in the area. I love this. She is such a bright light in their daily lives because lets be real, candy is everyone’s love language and she always has some to pass out. Once Ashley noticed a neighborhood girl who looked very sick. So, she took the young girl to the hospital, paid for doctor visit, and got the needed medications for her. The young girl had been suffering from malaria; one of the world’s leading causes of death. For that day, we can reduce the number from 19,000 to 18,999 children who died because Ashley was being the light. First she loved her neighbor and because she did that so well, she fought darkness – malaria – and Jesus smiled.

“So let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and praise our father in heaven.” Matthew 5:16

Now, I know that we don’t all live in malaria-ridden countries, but we should always be able to find a path for our light to shine no matter where we live. Find a trusted organization that cares for the poorest of the poor and give your money. It’s what the Bible tells us to do.

James might be my favorite book of the Bible. I often feel like I’m getting slapped in the face when I read the words James wrote.

 “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after the orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” James 1:27

Not religion that prays, sings, looks, acts the “right” way, but religion that loves.

“What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deed? Can such faith save him? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, “Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.” James 2:14 – 17

Our love for God should compel us to love people well. If our light is really shining, it will produce good deeds. Our faith won’t matter if we don’t tend to the needs of the poor. Our deeds amount to nothing if they aren’t driving out the darkness.

To recap what I’ve just rambled on about, we are called to be a light. To be the light, you need to love Jesus and people. When you love people, you care for their needs and that pushes out the darkness and you reflect Jesus. I have a friend who puts it this way, “Love leads love.”

Go love.

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It Was Good

I got to enjoy the world God created for us while on Safari this past week. God made a perfect world for us to live in. Our sin wrecked it. If this is what our sin filled world looks like, I can’t wait to see His perfect world. I’ve heard a lot of Tanzanians say that the oldest bones have been found between the Ngorongoro Crater and the Serengeti. This is also where many people believe the Garden of Eden was located. I don’t think we will ever really know this for sure until we can ask God himself, but as I look out over these two beautiful places I can see it. I can feel it.

IMG_4195God spoke: “Light!”
        And light appeared.
    God saw that light was good
        and separated light from dark.
    God named the light Day,
        he named the dark Night.
    It was evening, it was morning—
    Day One.”

IMG_4049God spoke: “Sky! In the middle of the waters;
        separate water from water!”
    God made sky.
    He separated the water under sky
        from the water above sky.
    And there it was:
        he named sky the Heavens;
    It was evening, it was morning—
    Day Two.”

IMG_1466I was fortunate enough to go on Safari with my family and friends the last three days. Wow! We saw the Big Five and so, so much more.

IMG_4084We rode in the coolest Safari car ever where the roof lifts up and you can stand to look around.

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IMG_1511Binoculars are a must unless you are Ben, our Safari guide, who can spot things with his naked eye that I still can’t see with binocs.

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“God spoke: “Separate!
        Water-beneath-Heaven, gather into one place;
    Land, appear!”
        And there it was.
    God named the land Earth.
        He named the pooled water Ocean.
    God saw that it was good.

11-13 God spoke: “Earth, green up! Grow all varieties
        of seed-bearing plants,
    Every sort of fruit-bearing tree.”
        And there it was.
    Earth produced green seed-bearing plants,
        all varieties,
    And fruit-bearing trees of all sorts.
        God saw that it was good.
    It was evening, it was morning—
    Day Three.”

  

IMG_4086Wide open plains of the Serengeti.  As peaceful as peaceful gets.

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IMG_4126Lions live in prides of about 15. The females do most of the hunting while the male defends the territory. Not pictured is a full grown Giraffe which these three lions had taken down just hours before we arrived.

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IMG_4056Giraffes are the tallest mammal on earth and their necks are too short to reach the ground. Aren’t they cute?!

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IMG_4107Elephants are the largest land animal in the world. They are endangered because they are hunted for their ivory tusks.

IMG_4164Zebras are single-hoofed animals that are, indeed, black with white strips. Not pictured are about a million more Zebras.

IMG_4075Gazelles drink very little water because they can extract moisture from the food they eat.

IMG_4230 2Cheetahs (my favorite) are the fastest land animal in the world. They can run up to 74 mph – that is pretty dang awesome.

IMG_1403Ya know what else is pretty dang awesome? Spending time with loved ones.

IMG_1420My little, not so little, brother. He told me that Safari is the coolest thing he has ever done. I agree.  In a perfect world, I’d be on Safari 24/7.

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IMG_1347If you know me, you know I don’t sleep on the ground. So, when I say that I stayed in a tent in the middle of the Serengeti, let me show you what kind of tent I’m talking about.

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IMG_4093And that’s how it’s done!  Pictured below was my morning view out the tent. IMG_4098Our family friend, Trent, joined us. What fun it was to have him along for our crazy family adventure. IMG_4074Montana is SO PRETTY! No question, but I fell in love with TZ when I saw the landscape pictured for the first time one year ago. TZ is into its rainy season now which means I am on spider lookout like never before, but man the green grasses and blue rain-filled skies are what postcards are made of.

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“God spoke: “Lights! Come out!
        Shine in Heaven’s sky!
    Separate Day from Night.
        Mark seasons and days and years,
    Lights in Heaven’s sky to give light to Earth.”
        And there it was.

16-19 God made two big lights, the larger
        to take charge of Day,
    The smaller to be in charge of Night;
        and he made the stars.
    God placed them in the heavenly sky
        to light up Earth
    And oversee Day and Night,
        to separate light and dark.
    God saw that it was good.
    It was evening, it was morning—
    Day Four.”

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IMG_4183Looking out over the Ngorongoro Crater at 2,000 feet deep.

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IMG_4190We had plans of visiting the Hadzabe Tribe, but as you can see by the pictures below the road washed out.  The guys worked two hours in the rain trying to fill in the hole, but there was no passing.

IMG_4206“God spoke: “Swarm, Ocean, with fish and all sea life!
        Birds, fly through the sky over Earth!”
    God created the huge whales,
        all the swarm of life in the waters,
    And every kind and species of flying birds.
        God saw that it was good.
    God blessed them: “Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Ocean!
        Birds, reproduce on Earth!”
    It was evening, it was morning—
    Day Five.”

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No better time to read than in the middle of a rainstorm.

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God spoke: “Earth, generate life! Every sort and kind:
        cattle and reptiles and wild animals—all kinds.”
    And there it was:
        wild animals of every kind,
    Cattle of all kinds, every sort of reptile and bug.
        God saw that it was good.

26-28 God spoke: “Let us make human beings in our image, make them
        reflecting our nature
    So they can be responsible for the fish in the sea,
        the birds in the air, the cattle,
    And, yes, Earth itself,
        and every animal that moves on the face of Earth.”
    God created human beings;
        he created them godlike,
    Reflecting God’s nature.
        He created them male and female.
    God blessed them:
        “Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge!
    Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air,
        for every living thing that moves on the face of Earth.”

29-30 Then God said, “I’ve given you
        every sort of seed-bearing plant on Earth
    And every kind of fruit-bearing tree,
        given them to you for food.
    To all animals and all birds,
        everything that moves and breathes,
    I give whatever grows out of the ground for food.”
        And there it was.

31 God looked over everything he had made;
        it was so good, so very good!
    It was evening, it was morning—
    Day Six.

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This is me enjoying a perfectly pretty yet imperfect world.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Neema Grace

IMG_9557I held, for the first time, a 3.3 pound baby. Her name is Neema (like the rescue center I work at) and she’s just the sweetest, most perfect thing ever!!IMG_9549

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IMG_3854She’s a fighter! We aren’t sure how early she was born, but being only 3.3 pounds at six weeks old leads us to believe she was pretty dang small. IMG_9553

IMG_9550Loooooooooook at how little she is in my hands! I just can’t get over it. IMG_9551Sadly, her mother passed away giving birth.  She is so much smaller in person than the pictures portray. Also the room she’s in at Neema is real hot – we keep the room at 90 degrees. IMG_3836My mama heart getting to be a mama bring tears to my eyes more often than not.  It really blows my mind that little Neema Grace should STILL BE INSIDE the womb. She is so small that she can’t even cry. Yet here she is just living her life of sleeping, eating, and pooping.  IMG_9349

IMG_3816“I praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” and that she is. Wonderfully made in every way. IMG_3827

 

 

One Year Ago

I fell in love one year ago today.IMG_8654

I fell in love with a sweet baby girl. A four day old, six pound, abandoned, perfect baby girl. My heart had never felt such pain and hope at the very same time. I held this baby in my arms because her birth mother abandoned her. I gave her a bottle, dressed her, and carried her out of the hospital because she had no one else to do so.

IMG_8965I don’t know if I’ll ever have the experience of having my own kids, bringing a baby home from the hospital, or choosing a baby’s name. I can’t even put into words the emotions my heart felt with this sweet baby in my arms.  My mama heart got to be a mama.

IMG_8971The pain my heart felt for this sweet baby’s mom who abandoned her left my eyes full of tears for hours, even days. At the same time, I knew Neema would place her in a forever home which gave my heart great hope and put the biggest smile on my face. I am so thankful for Charlee’s parents! She is in the most loving and caring home now and forever.

IMG_8655I left a big part of my heart in TZ that day. Charlee is one of the reasons why I am now living in TZ and doing the work I am doing here.

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I play a small roll in the grand scheme of things. Really. There are two million orphans in Tanzania alone. I know I won’t be able to help them all, but I am thankful for the 43 beautiful faces I support, love, and care for everyday. Our God has a perfect plan. We just have to look past our broken humanness to see the roll which we each play.

Wild & Great

After visiting the Hadzabe Tribe last weekend, I’ve been giving this song which is written from God’s perspective a lot of thought.

“Come away with me, it’s never too late, I have a plan for you. It’s gonna be wild. It’s gonna be great. It’s gonna be full of me.” – Come Away by Jesus Culture

I haven’t found a Bible verse matching those lines, but as I got to thinking about different stories in the Bible they do seem wild, great, and full of God.

Daniel. He was thrown into a lion’s den for not worshiping king Darius and with an angel protecting him he lived. That’s pretty wild!

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. They walked out of the burning furnace not even smelling like fire. That’s pretty great!

Moses. He led a pretty wild life from the very beginning. Being hidden in a basket and sent floating down the Nile isn’t a norm, but it’s filled with God’s protection for sure! Moses lifting up his rod and parting the Red Sea just might be one of the greatest escape stories ever told and it has God’s power written all over it!

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The Hadzabe Tribe lives about four hours from Arusha.  During the rainy season, no one can get to them due to the water levels of the river.

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We were able to get out of the Safari car and walk in this dried up riverbed for a while. I loved every minute of it. All I could think about while walking was Moses parting the Red Sea. I would have loved to see this. How wild! How great!

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The more I learn about the world we live in, I see the fullness of God’s great design more and more. The Hadzabe rubbed sap from a tree on us that is used as a naturel mosquito repellent. Perfectly planned. There is another trees sap which is poisonous and the Hadzabe use it on the end of their arrows while hunting. Beautifully designed.

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I don’t want to sound too “Lion King-y,” but the circle of life is real and active. That was made clear to me while hunting with the Hadzabe. This tribe is one of the last true hunters-gatherers on the face of the earth. They make their bows and arrows and trade… “plants”… for arrowheads made by other tribes.

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It is just SO crazy to me that people really do live this way. They only eat if they kill something. They don’t speak Swahili.  They speak the “click” language. Guys, this was seriously one of the wildest things I’ve ever heard!

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I wouldn’t last a day out there. I never had a desire to hunt while growing up even though my dad would offer to take me.   I knew I wouldn’t be quiet enough for hunting which was proven true when we were told to stop talking during our hunt.

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I would have loved to see from someone else’s point of view the five of us girls following the Hadzabe around. Fossil purse, water bottle, and iPhone in hand videoing everything.  I’ve never felt so out of place until I got to shoot the bow!

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I was a natural (who never hit the target, but that’s beside the point) and I shot until my fingers hurt. It was great.

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I am turning 25 at the end of the month and I can confidently say my life is wilder and greater than I ever dreamed it would be by this age. I am proud to say it has been full of God. How else does one end up living in TZ serving orphaned kids?

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God dreamed big while creating the earth for us. Just look at the details in creation! And one day every tribe and tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord. Some might use Clicks, others Swahili or English, but what a joyous day that will be. “For God so loved the world.” My life growing up in Montana is equally applicable to this verse as is the Hadzabe Tribe, and your life, and orphaned babies’ lives, and everyone else living on the face of the planet.

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Until that day, dream big! Literally anything could happen. It will be wild, great, and full of God. I promise.

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“God is able to do far more than we ask or think! So, dream big.  He can handle it!”              – Dorris Fortson

Rolling Down The Mountain

Do you ever have a really great idea at 9:00 PM that your 9:00 AM self is convinced came from the spawn of satan himself? I do.

An example of one of those “great” ideas is when I told myself, “Go running in the morning even if it is cold outside.” Because, who wouldn’t want to cough for a week straight from breathing freezing cold air into their lungs?

If I tell myself I’m going to do something, I’ll do it because Lord knows I’m not going to let myself down! Skydiving. Scuba diving. Living in TZ. Dying my hair purple. Dying my hair pink. Getting a tattoo. Running a 10K. Buying a house. Being in the same room as Adam Levine.

Not all of those ideas were from the spawn of satan, but they all made me stop, tilt my head, and question why I was doing them at one point or another. Who actually likes running? Who wants a 30-year mortgage? Who wouldn’t want to be in the same room as Adam?

Anyways, all of this to say, I’ve got my next great spawn of satan idea.

I am going to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. And by climb, I mean die and roll down the mountain.

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Neema will be doing their charity climb July 5th – 12th and yours truly will be hauling her butt 19,341 feet up the tallest free-standing mountain in the world to raise awareness of the 42 orphaned, abandoned, and at-risk kids who are living at Neema here in Arusha, TZ. These kids are told they are nothing and will never amount to anything because of their poor start in life, but trust me, if I can make it up Kili these kids can do anything.

“You are doing this for a bunch of little babies who can’t help themselves. I’m just convinced that Peter, hanging upside down on the cross, the hard thing to do and said, “ya know what, I walked on water” You climbed mount Kilimanjaro.”

  • Dorris Fortson. Founder and Director of Neema Village

 

If you are interested in climbing Mount Kilimanjaro with me in July, let me know and I’ll get you the details.

Happy rolling!

Human Touch

Look at this precious hand resting on mine!

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Ema, who came to Neema two weeks ago, was called a “walker” because he would go door to door asking for food. He still eats as if it will be his last meal. It’s very sad and it’s a different mindset from the other kids at Neema who know they will eat again in four hours.

The first time I saw him, I looked at another missionary here at Neema and said, “Who is that child? He’s like a Tasmanian devil.” Poor kid has no idea what the heck is going on and only speaks Swahili. But only two short days later when I had him in Bible class, he started to win my heart.

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He has the cutest little voice you could ever imagine hearing. And, he’s a talker so naturally he’s a child after my own heart! He also helps me count in Swahili because I always mix up five and nine.

Ema was my little church buddy this week. He is very loving and is all about touch. He kept his hand on my arm the whole church service and when he wasn’t on my lap, but was sitting next to me, he had his hand on my leg and head resting on my arm. The church we were at today served tea after the service and it made my heart smile sharing my tea with him. After every drink he would look at me with his big eyes and beyond cute smile and say “tena” which means “again.” It was pretty dang cute.

It is very hard to communicate with a small child who doesn’t understand your language. I spent a great deal of the day chasing him down and trying to ask him if he needed to use the bathroom. I kissed him on the cheek because that’s universal and I got the sweetest kisses back. We also laughed at ourselves as we counted to 20 over and over and over.

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Ema wanting to always hold hands or be on my lap reminded me of the importance of human touch. It breaks my heart to think that we have 42 kids who don’t have parents to give them the needed love and attention for proper brain development. It also warms my heart knowing that this is where God has me right now, helping these kids feel cared for and loved.

Running in Circles

Wazungu is a Swahili word that Tanzanians use when referring to white people. But, it means more than just “white person.” It means people who are always running in circles.

Have you ever reheated your coffee in the microwave? Lord bless all of us who are so busy we can’t even mange to finish a cup of coffee before it gets cold. Have you ever reheated your coffee multiple times? Have you ever forgotten that you have reheated your coffee? This happened to me so many times when I was a Pharmacy Tech in Montana. I’m talking about finding the coffee in the microwave hours later. Yes, hours later.

One evening, shortly after I started attending the college group where I am now one of the leaders, our worship leader led us in a song that I had never heard before. As I listened to the song, I found myself confused. Here’s why. The lyrics to the song are as follows:

 

“I’m so forgetful, but You always remind me

You’re the only one who brings me peace.

So I come, Lord, I come

To tell You I love You.

To tell You I need You.

To tell you there’s no better place for me than in Your arms. 

To tell You I’m sorry for running in circles

For placing my focus on the ways, not on Your face.”

 

– Running in Circles by United Pursuit

 

I thought to myself, “Hmmm… I don’t know about y’all in this college group, but I love Jesus and wouldn’t “forget” about God’s love towards me.” In the middle of this thought, God asked me how many times I had reheated my coffee that very same day at work. Talk about a slap in the face. It opened my eyes to the truth that if I can forget what I had done 45 seconds ago, I could surely forget that only God brings me peace.

 

Here’s how I’ve been running in circles lately:

*Forgetting my water bottle when going to fill the water bottle up.

*WHAT DAY OF THE WEEK IT IS. I seriously slept through Monday because of this stupid virus I can’t kick.

*The antibiotic I should be taking twice daily to kill said virus.

*My TZ phone when heading to town.

*My laptop which I needed in the office.

Forgetting everything listed above def meant that I spent a lot of time running in circles the last few days. I have also literally run in circles trying to meet my daily activity goal…wazungu!

I’ve done my fair sure of running in circles when it comes to my spiritual life as well. Here’s the beauty about a circle. You always end up back where you started, and God will always be there, loving you nonetheless.

 

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Power

“There goes the power” is something I say far too often. This past fall at Neema the power was off more often than it was on. You know you live in a developing country when you run to plug everything you own in as soon as the power turns on. But, I’ve learned to live without electrical power. Yes, I do feel slightly helpless when the ability to Google something is ripped out of my hands, but there is a certain kind of peace which washes over the room when there isn’t any power. You hear the birds more clearly. With fewer distractions, you notice the sounds of kids running and playing.

I know you’ve heard me quote worship song after worship song before. I just love listening to worship music! It calms my heart. Worship music washes peace over me like a power-less room does. I can hear God more clearly. With less distraction, I notice His voice and hear His plan.

Every time I lift my hands up to God as a sign of worship, I am saying, “there goes the power.” My soul finds rest.

What an odd concept. We don’t live in world where we are glad to lose power. We want all of the power all of the time. If I had the power, I wouldn’t be bed ridden with a headache at the moment. My head feels like it is going to roll off of my shoulders if I try and stand up which is really starting to make me mad because I had fun things planned with volunteers today! WHY.

“Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you” Psalm 116:7

Being powerless to headaches and fatherless children and cancer and death and a million other things we can’t control, reminds me to continue to lift my hands up and say, “there goes the power.”

I see His power in the endless plains of the Serengeti. Such great beauty and He simply spoke everything into existence. IMG_8238 2

 

Joy

How joyful I am to be jealous of the setting sun knowing that it is going to wake up another part of the world that I love.

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While visiting a Massai church this morning, I was reminded of the overwhelming love and joy that my heart has for Tanzania.  It’s a painful joy because everything within me misses MT and my loved ones there.

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Pictured above are two young moms with their kids showing us their homes after church. Talk about loving people well. They have got it down!  They were truly some of the most joyful ladies I have ever met.

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You eat and drink what is placed in front of you. I’m with Kim in this picture and we all have her to thank for my Tanzanian loving heart!

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Psalm 32:11 “Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart!”